Rebuilding Life After Divorce: A Christian Woman’s Journey of Faith and Remarriage with Ash Morrison

In this second part of Ash Morrison’s story on Sunburnt Souls, host Dave Quak explores Ash’s journey of rebuilding her life as a Christian woman after divorce. Ash shares the challenges of navigating divorce, parenting three young children (including one with disabilities), and unexpectedly meeting and marrying Zac, a non-Christian at the time. She discusses wrestling with guilt, biblical interpretations of divorce, and the transformative power of God’s grace in her unconventional path to remarriage. The episode highlights the importance of seeking God’s guidance, the messiness of life, and finding blessings in brokenness.

Key Takeaways:

• Ash planned to stay single for years post-divorce to focus on healing and parenting, but God had other plans, leading her to meet Zac just three months after her separation.
• Wrestling with biblical teachings on divorce and remarriage, Ash initially felt labeled as an “adulteress” but learned God’s grace covers brokenness.
• Ash and Zac prioritised their children’s needs in blending their families, allowing the kids to guide the pace of their relationship.
• Despite unconventional choices (like moving in together before marriage), Ash and Zac made deliberate decisions to honor their faith, such as abstaining from intimacy until marriage.
• Ash’s story underscores that God can bless and redeem even imperfect choices, offering hope to those navigating divorce and remarriage.

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Transcript

It’s amazing how it worked out. Did you think it would or wouldn’t when you first got divorced?

00:00:33 - 00:00:35
Ash Morrison:
With Zac, or just in general?

00:00:35 - 00:00:49
Dave Quak:
As a Christian woman facing divorce, it’s not the ideal plan. In that moment, did you still have the same faith?

00:00:49 - 00:01:06
Ash Morrison:
Yes, I had faith it would be okay. I told someone at church, “If there’s ever a time to get divorced, now’s good. I’m 30, I’ve got life to live, and I have three kids, so I’m not in a rush to have more.”

00:01:06 - 00:01:07
Dave Quak:
You said that to them?

00:01:07 - 00:01:27
Ash Morrison:
Yeah! I said, “I’m 30 with three kids, seven and under. This is the most opportune time to have a divorce, right?”

00:01:27 - 00:01:59
Ash Morrison:
But God had other plans. My psychologist advised giving myself two years before dating—one year to heal and one for the kids, as they often show issues after a year. I thought I wouldn’t meet someone until I was 40.

00:01:59 - 00:02:33
Dave Quak:
You thought you’d be shelved for ten years?

00:02:33 - 00:02:54
Ash Morrison:
With a seven, four, and two-year-old—one disabled—I felt like I had baggage. I didn’t want to waste anyone’s time, including my kids’.

00:02:54 - 00:03:26
Dave Quak:
Your dating profile: “I’ve got kids, one’s disabled, it’s a long, hard life”?

00:03:26 - 00:03:51
Ash Morrison:
Exactly! My youngest, Archer, was two, barely chewing, not sitting or walking. He’d scream every hour in our quiet townhouse, waking the neighbors. I tried soundproofing his room, but it was tough in a rental with no money.

00:03:51 - 00:04:17
Dave Quak:
You planned to stay single for ten years. What happened instead?

00:04:17 - 00:04:36
Ash Morrison:
God had a different plan. I met Zac three months after my separation in December—around March.

00:04:36 - 00:04:43
Dave Quak:
Disclaimer: This episode doesn’t reflect Sunburned Souls’ views. Continue.

00:04:43 - 00:04:59
Ash Morrison:
It sounds horrible, and I wouldn’t advise it. I’d judge others for dating so soon, but we started dating in May, five months post-separation.

00:04:59 - 00:05:12
Dave Quak:
First kiss?

00:05:12 - 00:05:59
Ash Morrison:
March. Embarrassing, I know. But Zac’s the greatest human. There was no adultery in my marriage’s end, yet I felt like an adulteress based on my understanding of biblical divorce teachings.

00:05:59 - 00:07:47
Ash Morrison:
I thought if there’s no adultery, divorce makes you an adulteress, and anyone you marry becomes an adulterer. That mindset crushed me. I thought, “If I’m already an adulteress, who cares?” But I learned God doesn’t label me that way. It took a year to shed that guilt.

00:07:47 - 00:08:34
Dave Quak:
That passage is confusing. Also, your marriage wasn’t a flippant divorce—you fought for it for years.

00:08:34 - 00:09:09
Ash Morrison:
Yes, it was our third attempt at counseling. The May I met Zac would’ve been my 10th anniversary. It wasn’t a light decision.

00:09:09 - 00:09:52
Ash Morrison:
I’d never say divorce is the answer. It’s a last resort. I’d never tell anyone to stay in an abusive marriage, though. Everyone’s story is unique, and I answer to God for my choices.

00:09:52 - 00:10:50
Ash Morrison:
I kissed Zac early, and I’ll explain that to my kids one day. But God showed me you can be blessed in brokenness. He used that time to grow me, challenging my belief that you can’t be blessed if you’ve done wrong.

00:10:50 - 00:11:41
Dave Quak:
It’s not transactional. God loves the broken.

00:11:41 - 00:13:27
Ash Morrison:
Exactly. Zac wasn’t a Christian when we met, but we connected over shared struggles during COVID. I told Dave I was hanging out with a non-Christian guy, and the more I liked Zac, the more I panicked about being unequally yoked.

00:13:27 - 00:14:12
Dave Quak:
But Zac got baptized soon after!

00:14:12 - 00:14:39
Ash Morrison:
I told Zac, “If God says no, I’m out, even the day before our wedding.” We met in March, started dating in June, got engaged the next August, and married the August after that. It was fast, against my two-year plan.

00:14:39 - 00:15:37
Dave Quak:
If you’re struggling with mental well-being, you’re not alone. Check out our 28-day course for $28 at sunburnedsouls.com or subscribe to Sunburned Souls. Let’s get back to Ash.

00:15:37 - 00:16:23
Ash Morrison:
One morning, I was unwell, and Zac took my kids to school. I panicked, thinking he’d steal my car or kids. Dave called, saw Zac driving, and reassured me. That was a God moment.

00:16:23 - 00:18:01
Ash Morrison:
Zac loved me like the Bible describes a husband’s love, despite not knowing Jesus. He sent flowers, gave thoughtful Mother’s Day gifts, and slept on a hospital floor when Archer was sick. Christians questioned me, saying, “You know better,” but I knew I was divorced despite doing the “right” things.

00:18:01 - 00:20:08
Ash Morrison:
I told Jess at school about Zac, bracing for disappointment. She said, “We’ll pray for him.” I was clear with Zac: if God said no, I’d walk away. I couldn’t live with someone just spectating my faith.

00:20:08 - 00:21:08
Ash Morrison:
One night, the kids asked Zac to pray, and he declined, not wanting to pretend. That was a turning point. I told him I couldn’t continue if he didn’t share my faith.

00:21:08 - 00:23:30
Ash Morrison:
I said, “I’m falling in love, but I won’t marry someone unequally yoked again. Sort out your relationship with God.” I questioned my faith daily, reassessing if I was sinning by dating him.

00:23:30 - 00:25:11
Ash Morrison:
Zac took it seriously, attended men’s group, and found Jesus. His story’s in his episode (linked in notes). God worked it for good.

00:25:11 - 00:26:09
Ash Morrison:
Zac’s amazing, serving at church, loved by all. God shattered my ten-year solo parenting plan, revealing His love for the broken.

00:26:09 - 00:28:11
Ash Morrison:
We let the kids lead our blending process, with playdates and sleepovers at their pace. We moved in together before marriage due to the housing market, pushing our wedding from March to August. It was for protection, to know each other fully.

00:28:11 - 00:29:33
Ash Morrison:
We chose not to be intimate before marriage, especially when I joined the worship team. I couldn’t lead while knowingly sinning.

00:29:33 - 00:31:12
Ash Morrison:
Zac offered to stay in Brisbane, but I needed to know any issues before marriage. God blessed us, covering our family through it all.

00:31:12 - 00:32:07
Dave Quak:
Life is messy, and your story isn’t prescriptive but descriptive of God’s work. Seek God and good counsel for your own path.

00:32:07 - 00:33:12
Dave Quak:
Ash, you’re a great communicator. Thanks for sharing. Please pray for us.

00:33:12 - 00:34:05
Ash Morrison:
Thank you, Jesus, for today and every day. Thank you for the listeners and the gift of testimony. My heart goes to struggling mothers and hurting wives. I pray for restoration in marriages, that You fill our gaps with Your peace and grace. May they know You deeper. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

00:34:05 - 00:34:27
Dave Quak:
Amen. Thanks, Ash, and listeners. Send speaker suggestions or subscribe at sunburntsouls.com. Have a great week, and we love you in Jesus’ name.